Riding the Proverbial "Emotional Roller-Coaster"

 

Okay so this is not a roller coaster but you get the picture.

First I want to apologize to those who are faithful in following our story... there has definitely been an extended silence on this end.  The short, easy excuse is that I have had to play "catch up" from our crazy summer and so have been busier than normal.  

I have also been trying to weed through the best options for our homeschooling this year and it has not been real clear what will be the best choice.  

On top of that I started back working three nights a week after having taken a leave of absence while the girls were here... and that takes about 25 plus hours out of my typical week.

But the longer and more complicated reason for not writing has more to do with the "emotional roller-coaster" that we have been on for some time now.  You see, I have sat down many times at my computer to blog the latest happenings but I have been very much at a loss for words.

 Let me take a few steps back...

When we decided to host Katya and Mariana this summer it was already decided in our minds that God was calling us to move forward on adopting them.  We had been praying about adoption for over a year and had prayed specifically about Katya and Mariana for several months.  Hosting was simply to have them here with us and give them the opportunity to meet us.  At their ages they have to also stand before a judge and say yes or no to adoption so we wanted to give them the information they would need to make the best decision.

We had a wonderful summer and felt that everyone was connecting and getting along great.  But we also realized that the decision to be adopted was not as easy as we would have thought.  With little bits of information here and there we came to see that it was actually a very complicated decision for the girls and certainly not one that any teenager should ever have to make.

Katya and Mariana have some strong connections in Ukraine... some of which are with family.  I am not able to go into all the details but I think it is very sad that they are put into a position where they have to make some tough choices.  Obviously we want what is best for them and to be completely transparent here... I am not sure what that is.

Now in most situations like this you could work through a whole lot with some good open conversation about the pros and cons etc.  But when there is a humongous (and I mean HUMONGOUS) language barrier between you, that much needed conversation becomes pretty elusive.   

If that isn't bad enough throw in thousands of miles, a very big ocean,  a few continents between you AND an unreliable internet service and you have the perfect mix for frustration, doubts, and you guessed it, an emotional roller-coaster.

We are currently putting our paperwork on hold as we give the girls more time to pray about this decision.  Our prayer would be that God would make His perfect plan very clear to all of us.  And then that He would give us all the courage to follow it no matter what that looks like.

If we do proceed with an adoption there will need to be a strong desire by all parties for this to happen because the transition required in leaving your country, culture, language, family, friends and every thing familiar will be challenging at best.

We REALLY covet your prayers at this time as we work through this.

Please be patient and check back...